There are wonderful people on this earth. They may be members of our family, our friends and acquaintances, or people we don’t even know. They can serve as our earthly angels, those that help us on our journey through this mortal life. They can often be an answer to our prayers, operating as God’s instruments in lifting us up when we are down. These earthly angels are the kind of angels we can see. We can also be earthly angels, seen to others. God hopes that we will serve and love our brothers and sisters on this earth and that we will be there for each other during difficult or joyful times.
My parents were some of my earthly angels. They loved me and supported me during the bad times and the good times of my life. They were there for me and my children, always showing love and kindness in any way they could. I would not have survived my trials without my angel parents.
My siblings and their spouses were also some of my earthly angels. They showed kindnesses in countless ways and helped me and my children to survive emotionally, financially and spiritually. I had cousins that came to my aide and provided for my needs. Dear friends listened to my woes and sorrows and provided hope, some even helped with home improvements. All these – my angels, were willing to mourn with me and comfort me. These “seen” angels were a great comfort to me.
I have also been blessed in my life to feel some unseen angels. This type of angel is not of this earth in a mortal state. They are heavenly beings that have either lived on this earth before, or beings that are yet to be born on this earth. They have come to me in spirit form and I have felt their sweet, comforting presence from time to time. I may not have “seen” these angels, but I’ve known that they were there. Sometimes I have known who these angels were, and sometimes I have not. I believe we all have unseen angels around us, and if we become sensitive enough to heavenly things, we will feel them.
I love reading about angels in the scriptures. It has helped me understand more about what angels do and their purpose in our lives. In the Old Testament in Matthew Chapter 4, Jesus is being bombarded with Satan’s temptations as he is fasting for 40 days and 40 nights. Satan tries every trick that He thinks will break Christ’s will and succumb to his evil desires, but Christ’s goodness prevails. Jesus finally tells Satan to leave him and after Satan departs, the scriptures say, “…behold, angels came and ministered to unto him.” How did those angels “minister”? I think they came bringing their spirits of light, which brought God’s spirit to Christ to replace the evil he had been subject to. I think they spoke words of comfort and encouragement, maybe reminding Christ of who he really was and the importance of his earthly mission. I imagine them standing in a circle around Christ sharing their light and warmth with him after a dark and cold encounter with Satan.
Turning to Webster’s Dictionary, it explains angels in this way:
Angel: 1) A spiritual being that serves especially as a messenger from God or as a guardian of human beings. 2) A person (such as a child) who is very good, kind, beautiful, etc. 3) A spiritual being superior to humans in power and intelligence; especially: one in the lowest rank in the celestial hierarchy.
Then there is the idea of guardian angels.
Guardian: 1) Someone or something that watches or protects someone. 2) One that guards.
Guardian Angel: 1) An angel believed to watch and protect someone. 2) An angel believed to have special care of a particular individual.
I believe that angels come to help us and guide us, to support our worthy efforts and to “cheer us on”. I believe they can help protect us in times of need. I have felt comfort and support from angels. I believe they are around us, and often! Some people may doubt the presence of angels in their lives, but I don’t question that they are there – it is our awareness and our ability to believe in them that determines whether or not we feel their presence when they are with us. Christ was strengthened by angels in the Garden of Gethsemane as He suffered the most pain that anyone can suffer. I believe that we are also gifted with angels as we suffer our personal pains.
When I was a child I was unaware of heavenly angels, or so I thought. Yet I remember feeling one particular angel presence quite often, especially in my youth. My paternal grandfather died when I was two years old. I vaguely remember him in this life. My only real memory of him was him kneeling down to my little child level, and with a smile of kindness and love on his face he offered me a piece of candy – a peppermint candy I believe. That is my only earthly connection to him. After his passing and as I grew, I felt he was my guardian angel. I don’t know why I felt this way, no one ever mentioned to me that I might have a guardian angel during my life and I never thought much of it, other than to say I felt that he was with me on many occasions. I never expressed that feeling to my parents or family members, but I often sensed that he was watching over me. As an adult with increased awareness and belief, I treasure the times that my grandfather angel was with me. I know he cares about me and loves me though I have little memory of him. Every year as I visit his grave, I feel a special connection to this sweet man.
As a single parent, I was never really afraid to be home alone with my children at night. It is surprising to me that I didn’t feel fearful. I prayed each night that angels would be around my home to protect us from any evils that might be lurking. I prayed that these angels would form a barrier of protection surrounding my home with their light and power that evil could not penetrate. I know I wasn’t fearful because I had full confidence that if I asked for angels of protection, that they would be with me and my children.
After I had been divorced for about five years, I received word that Phil was to have a parole board hearing. The likelihood of him being released from prison and out on parole was a strong possibility. Because the charges relating to Phil’s abuse of my children had been dropped by the District Attorney at the original sentencing, neither they nor I were considered “victims” in the crime, so we would not be notified of any changes in his status or of any legal action concerning him. Only victims who were included as part of the charges during sentencing would be notified. That seemed like a crime in itself. However, other children that had been abused by Phil were considered victims and charges dealing with them had not been dropped and were used as evidence against him. The parents of Phil’s “victims” had been notified by the parole board that Phil would have a hearing which would determine his possible release after only serving time in prison for five years, or his continued incarceration.
When the parents of the child victims received word of the parole hearing, they contacted my mother to inform her about the scheduled hearing. My mother decided that it would be best to tell me about the hearing in person rather than on the phone, so she came to my home. I was in the backyard doing some yard work when she arrived. As she approached me, I could sense that she had some bad news to share. Mom was trembling slightly as she informed me about the upcoming hearing. We knew this kind of news was something which would eventually come, and we had all been dreading the time it would actually happen. None of us could imagine that Phil would be released from prison ever, considering his crimes. But we also knew that his fate was out of our control, and the worst scenario in our minds would be his release from prison.
As mom explained to me about the hearing, I had an unusual sensation. Suddenly I felt that I had just been surrounded by a group of angels. They were in a circle all around me, with no break in the circle – it was a solid shield of fortification. I was amazed at what I was feeling – it was something I had never experienced before in my life. When my mother finished talking, I felt no apprehension or fear about the news she had shared. It was as if no bad news had been given, and I felt protected from the harm that this news may bring to me.
For the next few weeks until the parole board hearing took place, I felt my circle of angels with me all the time. They were with me everywhere I went. I felt their presence with me at home, day and night, at work and even in my car. I didn’t fully understand then that they had been sent to be with me to protect me emotionally and spiritually from what was going to happen. They were also helping to prepare me to attend the hearing. I did not want to go, to be in Phil’s presence again, but I knew that I had to go. In his confessions, Phil had never mentioned that he had touched my youngest child in an abusive fashion. After he had gone to prison and my child was a bit older, this child had told me what Phil had done. This would be new information for the parole board as they had not been a part of the original charges against him, and I wanted the parole board to know this information. I knew I needed to be at that hearing and report to the parole board that Phil had lied by not fully disclosing all the abuse he had perpetrated. I felt that if I was in the room at the hearing as Phil heard the additional accusations, he would not be able to deny it.
A few days before the hearing, I decided that I should prepare myself mentally, emotionally and spiritually to attend the hearing. I was driving alone in my car, headed someplace where I could be alone and ponder. I was thinking about this group of angels and how they had been with me every day since the news of the hearing. It was still curious to me and I wondered who these angels were. Talking to myself but speaking out loud I said, “I wonder who you are?” Suddenly I was given the answer to my question. All at once I knew who these angels were. They were my grandparents on both sides of the family, my brother that had died in infancy, great-grandparents that I had never met and a male spirit that I knew had not yet been born on this earth. I was overwhelmed with emotion as this answer was given to me. I knew my grandparents were there because I recognized each of their spirits. Both my grandmothers and my maternal grandfather that had been alive during my childhood were there – I knew it because I felt their presence and personalities as I would have felt them in life. I knew my paternal grandfather was there who had been my guardian angel, because I recognized his spirit from when he was present during other times of my life. Though I had not known my brother on this earth, I felt the sibling connection between us. And I believe that the other male spirit was a child I had miscarried during my marriage. They had all come to be with me, to support me and literally pull me through this difficult time. I drove along in tears, so grateful to have been given this knowledge and to feel these precious angels. I learned a great lesson from this experience – all I had to do was to ask, and the answer was given. If only we could always have the faith to ask, believing that we would receive an answer.
A few days later I attended the parole hearing. My parents and siblings attended the hearing with me. It was sobering as we entered the prison walls and were escorted to the hearing room. We had been told ahead of time not to bring personal affects with us, as we could not have them in the board room. We were not allowed to wear our shoes, and had to remove any metals such as belts or change from our pockets. I could only carry some tissues with me. We felt as if we were the accused, having been stripped of all our belongings except the clothes we were wearing. The officers that escorted us to the room were quiet but kind, but the feeling in this prison was dark and oppressive. It was a very unpleasant setting and I was looking forward to having this hearing over with. My family and I were escorted into the hearing room first. Members of Phil’s family sat a few rows behind us. I was not comfortable interacting with them, so we were allowed to be seated separately. There were members of the parole board on the stand, a court recorder and several officers standing by. Lastly, Phil was brought into the room. He was seated several feet in front of us, with his back to us. I did not have to look him in the eye or ever see his face directly, which was a relief to me. He was not allowed to turn around and look at us. He was told who was in the board room attending the hearing, so he was well aware that my family and I were there. As the hearing got underway, it was painful to hear the board members recount the charges against Phil. Several of my family members had written letters asking that the parole board keep him incarcerated. Phil was informed that we had written letters to the parole board. They cited my letter which declared that Phil had lied about abusing my youngest child, and gave him an opportunity respond to this. For the first time he admitted to that portion of the abuse. I felt he would not have admitted to it if I had not written the letter and not been in the room to be a witness to his response.
Throughout the hearing, we had to listen to various accounts of the charges and of Phil’s depraved behavior. My mother was seated on one side of me, my father on the other. Knowing that it would be very hard on me to hear all these things, my dear mother put her hand on top of mine to comfort me. Her hand began to tremble so badly, and I knew she was struggling with this almost as much as I was. But I felt calm, because my angels were still with me – they were especially with me now, and I felt the comforting effect of their presence. Without thinking, I put my free hand (that my mother was not holding) on top of her shaking hand, because I knew that my angels and I could help calm her. I was amazed that even though this hearing was one of the worst experiences of my life, I felt a calm and strength inside of me that I had not expected to feel. It was because my angels were there with me. They saved me that day.
When the hearing had ended, I still felt the strength and the power of my angel circle. My family and I were relieved that it was over, and as we left the confines of the prison walls we felt a wonderful feeling of freedom. We could leave this dark place and return to the light of day and the freedoms we enjoyed. As we walked to the car to leave, I noticed a change in the heavenly presence that surrounded me. My angel group was no longer with me. They had stayed for as long as they were needed, and had been permitted to return now to their existence. I felt the void of that loss, but will forever be grateful that my loving Heavenly Father sent those heavenly family angels to be with me in my time of great need.
After several days had passed we learned that the parole board’s decision had been made, and that Phil would be released from prison a few weeks later. That is not what I had hoped would happen. It was devastating to know that in spite of all the terrible evidence against Phil, that they would still release him. Yet once again, I was able to go on with life, enjoy my children and feel some calm and peace. I was certain that angels were helping to bring heaven a bit closer to our lives and sustain us during these dark times.
Several years ago I was visiting Windsor Castle in England and I saw a statue of a woman that I will never forget. The woman represents Queen Charlotte of England, she and her baby having died in childbirth. The statue portrays her as a spirit ascending to heaven, attended by angels on both sides of her, one of the angels cradling her dead child. Her pose, one hand pointed toward the sky, looks like she is being raised up, set free from earth’s bondage. I was so touched by this statue that I have thought of it often through the years. It reminds me that even when we may be at the lowest point in life (for Charlotte having crossed over death’s door), we can also be accompanied by angels that comfort and attend us in our darkest hours, bringing light and hope into our souls.